Blog #182: What “Becket” (1964) Teaches Us About Denial and Accepting Who We Are as Neur
- Jeffrey Snyder
- Feb 15, 2022
- 3 min read
If there is a movie out there that can teach us about what happens when we are in denial about something, it would have to be “Becket” (1964) starring Peter O’Toole and Richard Burton.
I bring this up because there are a lot of families and individuals that are in denial about something life changing such as being diagnosed as neurodiverse. I get it, we all want to run from something that will impact our lives, but we can’t hide from it.
But sometimes, the position we end up growing into ends up being our true calling. When we are diagnosed as neurodiverse or born disabled, those that don’t want us to be in that position end up being in denial about the situation.
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Peter O’Toole as King Henry II and Richard Burton as Future Archbishop of Canterbury Thomas Becket in “Becket” (1964)
Quite simply, “Becket” teaches us that when we are in a particular position in our lives, there is always that opportunity to grow out of that position and become something better.
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In a way, that’s kind of what happened to me. As many of you in my inner circle know, I was a fanfiction writer and member of the Brony Fandom for six years until early 2019, when I found out that “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic” was going to have one final season in Season 9. I actually remember the day that I read that particular article: it was on “Equestria Daily” and I was in Sanibel, Florida at the time.
To me, looking back now, that was seemingly the sounds of a higher power calling me to answer something greater than just Brony and Comic Cons and Fanfiction writing. The higher power was calling me to become an autism/neurodiversity self-advocate and public speaker that ultimately led me to creating “Going the Distance” in May 2021.
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Editorial use only Mandatory Credit: Photo by Snap/Shutterstock (390935h) FILM STILLS OF ‘BECKET’ WITH 1964, RICHARD BURTON, CHARACTER, PETER GLENVILLE, THOMAS BECKET: ARCH OF CANT IN 1964 VARIOUS
Of course, that is what we see in “Becket” (1964), although I didn’t have anyone in denial about me leaving the Brony Fandom. Thomas Becket didn’t start out in the Brony Fandom or attended Comic Cons or was a Fanfiction writer.
He started out as King Henry II’s Chancellor of the Treasury and then one day, he got a calling from a higher power to become the Archbishop of Canterbury.
Naturally, King Henry II was upset by his friend’s decision and spends the entire movie in denial about what Becket has become to the point where he declares in a drunken stupor, “Will No One Rid Me of this Meddlesome Priest”? This ultimately leads up to Becket’s assassination and eventual Canonization at the end of the film.
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If there is something to be gained from watching a movie like “Becket,” it would be that while it can be hard to accept a diagnosis of Neurodiversity or Disability, you can’t hide from the truth. Sure, you may have had expectations for your loved one or friend, but the truth of the matter is that you cannot control someone’s destiny. If God or a higher power has something better for you, then you have to go with what they have to offer.
This includes being diagnosed as neurodiverse or if you are born with a disability. The more accepting you are of the outcome, the healthier that both you and your loved one will be. The more you are in denial, the deeper the wedge will be driven. Trust me, you should take the first option.
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Catch you all later!!
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